On a daily basis, I find myself listening. I listen to conversations with close friends. I listen to co-workers. I listen to podcasts. And, I listen to my own voice. There is a persistent message that permeates and resonates through the air waves to my consciousness. That message is “I’m not worthy.” Unlike some others, the manifestation of this message is not always recognizable. It’s a trickster because it hides behind an appearance of confidence, productivity, and even lightheartedness. Yet, to the attuned spirit, it is an obnoxiously loud noise that leaves a ringing sensation in my spirit.
We feel unworthy for many reasons. I’m convinced that most of our angst and turmoil as adults stems from unresolved trauma somewhere in our lives. However, I think that there are forces of evil at work against us and those forces often present as lies. And, we readily believe lies when we aren’t convinced of the truth. The truth is, we are human and flawed and imperfect, but indeed worthy. I think it’s important to get to the root of these feelings, and understand why. Therapy/counseling are great ways to do that and I highly recommend it. Once we identify the root cause and recognize the need to rid ourselves of these feelings, how, then, do we overcome? Here are three ways to overcome feelings of unworthiness and move forward with hope:
- Find your way to love. I truly believe that most of our deepest sensations and feelings stem from either love or fear. I also think that it is highly unrealistic to live a life without the presence of fear. However, I believe that when we find our way to love we are released from the power of fear. When we consciously choose to move in the direction of love, we recognize the places in our lives that fear is in control. Finding our way to love starts with a commitment to loving ourselves. Loving ourselves begins with believing that we are here, on this earth, at this time, for a purpose. There is no purpose too big or not big enough. Once we accept that we are here for a purpose, we will begin to actively seek ways to find and pursue that purpose. We will ask ourselves questions and pay attention to life as it provides answers. Finding our purpose involves digging deeper into our own thoughts, beliefs, and values. We learn to sit quietly with ourselves, learn the sound of our own voice and pay attention to what makes our hearts beat a little faster. We will begin to sense more acceptance of ourselves which leads to a greater self-love. We will appreciate our own uniqueness and value it in others without the need to compare. We realize that love requires an all-in and authentic approach to how we live.
- Replace lies with the truth. Humans lie. We tell lies and we believe lies. We hear so many lies, on a regular basis, that we begin to question the truth. Feelings of unworthiness are often nestled in lies that we have told and believed. We hear lies so often that sometimes they become our truth. Perhaps someone of significant importance to us, called us names or made us feel inferior. Or maybe we never learned to appreciate the characteristics and traits that make us different from others. It is likely that somewhere on our life’s journey, we believed the lie that we’re not worthy of affection, time, care or love. We must recognize that as a lie because that’s what it is. We need to replace that lie with the truth that we are valuable and deserve the best that life has to offer.
- Be intentional about affirming yourself. Here’s the scoop on affirmations: they work. When we consciously speak words of truth, love, and light something incredible happens. Our words carry power and often create the reality that we live each day. The two words, I Am, are at the beginning of either negative or positive self-talk. The words that follow will set the tone for how you see yourself and how you see the world around you. To overcome unworthiness we must practice affirming ourselves by speaking positive words. If you’ve always spoken or heard words of negativity about yourself, if may be difficult at first. But, that means that you’ll have to be much more intentional with your practice. For example, create a wallpaper for your smartphone home screen that says I Am Worthy of Love, so that every time you look at your phone you see it. Or perhaps every morning when you’re brushing your teeth, you look into the mirror and think the words I Am Here for a Purpose over and over in your mind.
When we suffer from emotional, psychological, and spiritual distress, the key is to remember that we have power over that pain. We have power over the havoc it wreaks in our lives and we have the authority to heal. Find your way to love, replace lies with the truth, and be intentional about affirming yourself. You’re worthy!